Pussy Massage How to give her an epic intimate massage

Pussy Massage

How to give an epic intimate massage

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what is a pussy massage?

It is what it sounds like: a massage for the pussy.

It might take around 30 to 90 minutes and is not about preparing her for sex or having an orgasm. A pussy massage is not goal oriented and you need to make clear to her that it’s not about you and your ego and her needing to perform for you.

It’s really about her experiences and whatever needs to be experienced in that moment.

why is it awesome... and intense?

A pussy massage also allows the woman receiving it to sensitize her body even more, to sensitize her vagina and shed some numbness or pain that she might have there. Emotions can be stored in the vagina (and body) and make a vagina either painful or numb.

This is good to know, because it also means that the massage can lead to intense emotions for the woman receiving it, so she might not only react with pleasure, but also react with pain, sadness with or anger.

Whatever arises, if she allows herself to show emotions like this in front of you and to cry, to shake, to become angry, that’s a sign that she trust towards you. She then allows you to be a witness of those emotions.
Layers are being shed and it allows her to be able to fully re-sensitize her body.

 

Of course, she also can react with intense pleasure and firework orgasms! 

Before you start

  • Have short and clean nails
  • Set up the space, maybe with candles or music (some might find music to be distracting rather than helpful though)
  • Set up your mental space, aka your mind, for example through meditation

The beginning

Start by touching and massaging her entire body.
You want to allow her to drop into her body and to fully relax.
Touch her hair, neck, legs, belly, all of her.
Then go to her breasts and give them some love. Allow your heart to be open while you touch her.

 

To rise the arousal, touch her inner thighs, and experience with the touch that feels the most pleasurable to her. Some women like to feel your passion, some react stronger to featherlike touch. 

Then...

Once are ready to stay located towards her inner thighs, her vulva and her vagina, you want to make sure that you are sitting comfortably.
You might want to prop her hips up a little bit by putting a pillow underneath her sacrum and also to use a pillow for yourself to sit on.
Her legs are on either side of your body so that you can easily access her yoni.

Start by putting your hand over how vulva and pubic bone and a hand over her heart, and then slowly move the hand on her heart down towards her vulva.

You can gently tap on the pubic bone

Then apply some lube or oil on your hands and circle with the palm of your hand on the entire vulva.
Or you can spread the oil from her pubic bone down towards her perineum a few time, or from her perineum up towards the pubic bone (see the video at the beginning of the article for illustration)

The vulva

Massage or stroke the outer vaginal lips as well as the inner vaginal lips and the corridor in between.
The lips are full of nerve endings that become much more touch sensitive and pleasurable when she is aroused.

 

We often put a lot of emphasis on the head of the clitoris because of it’s intense sensitivity, but it’s really nice to be touched on the entire vulva and to experience what it feels like to be touched everywhere.

She might not be used to being stimulated or stimulating herself on her vaginal lips, therefore, at the beginning, she might not react to that touch all too much.
Still, the more aroused she gets, the more blood is flowing everywhere, and the more every part of her vulva and vagina becomes very sensitive to touch. 

You also might want to touch the perineum, which is between the vaginal opening and anus. That part is like a blood vessel network as well and when she’s aroused, that also becomes sensitive to pressure and to touch.

The Clitoris

You probably already know how to find the head of the clitoris.
It’s already quite known nowadays that the clitoris is it’s not just a little pearl on top, the one that we know about and that we can see, but it actually has arms that hug the vaginal opening. 

Each woman has a different kind of sensitivity around their clitoris and different kinds of strokes and intensity that she might like or not.

An over-stimulated clitoris can feel painful, or suddenly numb, and I am sorry to tell you that there is no rule about how fast, how much pressure ect. you can apply.
And even each individual woman has days when sth feels good that she didn’t like the week before. 
My point is: look at her and her body speaking to you, don’t just follow a protocol and stay curious.

The clitoris is protected by a hood and you can first touch the clit over that hood, either on the sides, or on top of it. 

  • You could circle with some oil on top of it for example.
  • If you want to remove the hood and touch directly on the clit, be really gentle with that touch, because for a lot of women it’s extremely sensitive once you remove the hood.

Your finger and your touch need to be as gentle as butterfly’s wings.

  • You can try circling
  • or going up and down
  • you could even try doing the alphabet on her clit and see what she responds to the most.

If you find a movement that she really enjoys, you want to repeat that movement for a while over and over again because if you constantly change and switch around, she won’t be able to relax into the touch and let the pleasure build up (this is also very true for g-spot stimulation)

From time to time you also might want to spread the energy from the clit and vulva throughout the entire body and stroke her body.
Your hands are very activated with her sexual energy while you’re touching her clit, so you can spread that in the rest of her body for a more full-bodied experience and also for avoiding an overstimulation of the clit.

Internal massage

First, massage and touch the entrance of the vagina without entering her yet.

Then place one or two fingers at the entrance and wait to see if her body starts sucking your fingers in and showing you with her body that she wants you to penetrate her. 
If she doesn’t give you those physical reactions, you want to also ask her if you’re invited to penetrate her.

If she says no, then you can just continue with the external massage, or maybe slowly go towards integration, and if she says maybe you can ask her what she needs.

But let’s say her body sucks you in, and she says yes, you want to very slowly go in, many up to the first knuckle.

The G-Spot

Around there you can start touching and looking for the G spot, which is on the belly side of the vagina. 

Some women have a G spot that is very near the entrance and women have it very far. Don’t sweat it if you don’t find the G spot. It’s okay. Also she might not really feel so much around her G spot yet. 

We all have also a lot of spots that are sensitive that are not yet famous, so you can even search for those spots: is there something on the sides, all around, that is actually super pleasurable to her? 

Let’s say you found her G spot, which is much easier to locate when she is really aroused as it swells and is therefore easy to feel. 

Different ways you can stimulate her G-spot, some women enjoy a lot of pressure on the G-spot, some don’t:

  • Put pressure and release pressure and release, almost as if you were ringing a doorbell.
  • Circle around it 
  • Do a “come here” motion
  • Go a little bit behind the G spot and do a  “come here” motion there
  • Go back and forth
  • Go sideways 
  • While you’re touching her G-spot you could continue touching her clitoris.
 

When you stimulate the G spot she might feel like wanting to pee because the G spot is on the urethra.
If that feeling doesn’t subside and she feels uncomfortable you can try to open your fingers in a “v” shape and continue stimulating the G spot but not right in the middle where the urethra goes.

Find a pleasurable stroke for her and repeat it, let her pleasure build and come closer to orgasm, you can have her edge (surfing the waves of pleasure near orgasm, reducing the stimulation so that she doesn’t orgasm, then intensifying the pleasure again), or fully orgasm.

 

Good to know

Internal spots can be particularly emotional for women, they can lead to intense pleasure, but also to intense emotions.

The AFE zone

If you want to go even deeper, then you can reach for her AFE zone, it’s a zone that is very easily stimulated with intercourse. You will find it a little bit before the cervix (Cervix is the deepest point of the vagina, feels like the tip of a nose), on the belly side of the vagina. 

It is an entire area that is very sensitive and orgasmic.

Again you can experiment with different strokes and pressure.

The Cervix

At the very end of the vagina is the cervix, it feels like the tip of a nose and you might not always be able to reach it with your finger(s).

You might want to just hold your finger there and just wait, let her feel, because the cervix can be sensitive, very emotional, and/or painful or numb.

It can also be very, very orgasmic.

But sometimes, emotional and physical tension need to be released from the cervix before it can bloom with ecstatic pleasure. Don’t make it a goal to shed her layers or to get to that point of pleasure. Allow for the moment to show what is needed.
Dearmoring ( the process of sensitizing the body) can take time and can need times of integration. 

If she is enjoying the touch on her cervix you can also push in and out
Or do little circles around the cervix.

Orgasm

Wherever you both choose to continue the simulation, you can let her edge a few times before she orgasms, if she orgasms.

You can let her ride the waves of her pleasure.

If a stroke feels really pleasurable to her, just keep doing that stroke and don’t change the intensity. 

Especially when she starts becoming louder, more intense and you feel the orgasm is coming closer, you might tend to think that now you need to intensify the stimulation, but it actually can be that for her in that moment, it’s best for you to not change anything, not to hit harder not to move faster but to stay the exact same way so that she can go over to orgasm. 

 

And again, it’s not about having an orgasm it’s not about her performing or you performing Don’t feel bad if there’s no orgasm.

Ending

In the end you can slow down and maybe leave your finger or fingers inside for a moment before you slowly remove them. 

And then you can either let her be,
or put your hand on her vulva and a hand on her heart again like at the beginning.

Then she might just need some time with herself to integrate the experience,
she might want to cuddle but she might also not want to cuddle.
Both is normal and healthy and good.

Thank you for getting the time to know your body or woman’s bodies! 



 Fotos: unsplash/Dainis Graveris

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